Men Love Rivals Elimination Ritual (情敌祛除法)

I used to see in movies how old western gentlemen settled with their love rivals:

Two gentlemen in exquisite attires would hold a gun dual in front of a lady. Both of them would stand back to back and then walked 10 steps and then turn their back and fire a shot. Whoever survives would win the lady… So this is how the story goes.

Now we don’t need to have this type of dual anymore with the help of the one we loved to hate: the Satan.

The below ritual calls upon the help of a Satan to remove one’s rivals in pursuing the lady he loves. This might not be a gentleman’s way to win over a lady… but at least both or lives of many parties would be spared, in a way…

In this case, any rivals in the process of courting this said lady would suddenly lose interest on females and become gays. With this character switch, only the spell caster is left to pursue the fair lady until success. After this guy is successful in winning the heart of the lady, Satan would appear in front of him to name his price. So, think twice before engaging this rival elimination ritual.

Now, the ritual:

This ritual must be performed on a full moon night and it is for man only.

First a talisman showing the head of Satan opening his mouth is drawn as above and then it is brought to an evil place: a haunted place, a graveyard, a battleground etc.

At the location and before midnight, one should dig a hole in the ground under moonlight. After that the talisman is arranged in the center of the hole, also one should light three black candles; each candle for one apex of the triangle.

After the candles are lit, one can start to summon Satan to appear. If everything goes smoothly, when the candles are half burnt; temperature in the surrounding would experience a suddenly drop. The spell caster should now voice out his intention for carrying out this ritual.

As soon as one has spoken, the hole should immediately be buried and he should leave the place at once without looking back. After the ritual, the number of admirers of the said lady would face a sudden drop as her pursuers would have lost interest in ladies… But there is no rule in preventing all his love rivals to fall in love with the spell caster, so try at one’s risk! Also, please remember that Satan will name his price soon.